Is a chance to spread love. You know me…about halfway through this we got through an understandable sound adjustment and I jumped on. Check out the whole video and see what I got a chance to talk about halfway through. #lovelima
And I got an interview off of what I’m doing in AirBnb in the area. So here’s what happened…
I have two roomies. One’s been with me 3 years and the other had been with us a year and a half…and then got a fabulous job in Columbus. While I was pretty bummed, an idea hit me. With all the people coming to town, why not see if there was a need for AirBnb locally. I’d heard there were hotels in town that got full, and I heard finding a place rent or even purchase was difficult right now because things were flying off the market so fast. Soooo
Decided to try something since one of my amazing roomies moved out…so hello AirBnB room. It was SO fun to decorate and think through what a guest would need when they crash with me for a few days. Check it out!
Why are people so hung up on rules? I have a theory that if we followed every rule we were ever given, that it would not cause Christ to smile at us and let us in to Heaven based on that alone. So what is the real catch then? What is their true purpose? I’m convinced that people worry so much about following the letter of the law they handicap themselves. Thoughts?
Do you think maybe it would be wise to follow the intention of the rule rather than the rule itself?
Oh oh…and it’s my birthday. So give me some good discussion…you know as a birthday present 🙂
My adopted brother asked me if I ever get scared of being broken again. He came to us as a foster and my mom adopted him and some of his siblings a few years ago. He’s been broken. My throat kind of constricted. And I said, “Like I was last year? I’ve been broken a few times. Last year was another. But I know by now that being broken isn’t the end. It’s the BEGINNING. But if my life has shown you anything, it’s that we all get broken no matter how hard we try to make everything perfect and make the right decisions. That’s inevitable. There’s no way to avoid it. Every one, even me, will let you down at some point. But being stronger inside and willing to let yourself lie down for a few before you pick yourselves back up is what counts.” He asked…is it worth it? A year and a half into losing my joy and I had a hard time answering right away. But I finally said “Twenty years ahead of you …yes. It’s worth it. There’s people you can go see and talk to that spent years learning how to show you how to be less broken. It always gets better. It always turns around. The real trick is finding the people and resources who can help you find a new normal. I’m your circle. We are your family. I promise we will get you through anything.”
What if the reality you are in…isn’t reality. What if the situation you are in is not what you think it is…but your perception is telling you something completely different because you are actually IN the situation. It’s all you know. Something different seems immoral…seems wrong…because in this reality you have all the answers you need to survive.
But something happens…and you are forced out…left cold and bewildered until you look around. What is this? How did you not see what was really going on? How could you not see the tears of those you affected? You catch yourself wondering just as you get comfortable…is this reality either?
Take another step back.
This isn’t about you or him anymore, it isn’t personal. Your perception is shattered…it’s about them too. Could one trivial word change their lives as well? What about a few hours of your time? Does what you do affect more than what you can see? Could your words inspire change here? Better their lives? Now you start to wonder…did I ever really know what right or wrong was? Have I been handicapping myself all along by what I “think” I can do?
Take another step back.
What do I really know? For that matter, who, do I really know. What am I really doing here? How am I affecting the world? What am I doing that will matter for eternity? Eternity. A scary thought. Every one dies…everyone…but not everyone truly lives. What am I doing to truly live.
Then you realize…these weren’t steps back…they were steps forward all along.
Maybe that’s when I realized that you can do and think whatever you want. You can pretend this all is a big deal…and that this drama matters…or even that you matter. You can keep pretending about whatever it is that is important…after all…it’s your funeral you are betting on to lose…and then it’s too late to take back all those years you wasted over nothing.
Tell the truth.
Get your good clothes dirty.
If you want to fight…fight yourself…and when you get tired…start fighting for someone else.
Quit lying to yourself and get on your knees before you miss the whole point to life.
I’m constantly surprised when I run into business owners who are still figuring out really simple tips and tricks to reducing their overhead or just plain old doing things a little simpler. It’s why these Mastermind groups are so popular though. Tons of people coming together and sharing a pool of knowledge so that everyone can get on the same page FASTER instead of wasting money and time working harder instead of smarter.
Business tip #1 – need a cute graphic but don’t have the funds for a professional peep? Try out a FREE program Canva.com. You’ll be blown away at what you can do for free to up the quality of your social media posts.
They say graphics get more views than status’ and videos get more views than graphics. But if you are still learning this social media thing…start with graphics. Canva makes that learning curve a heck of a lot easier.
Here’s a few things I realized I had learned since my bygone days…feel free to add to it…as I will be adding to it as I think of them!
I have learned…
that you live through HS…no matter how awful it is, it doesn’t define who you are.
that taking God’s name in vain is more than just words. We are made in His image, and God is love, and when our actions are unkind and unloving, THAT is taking His name in vain.
that you have to find yourself before you expect anyone else to.
that you should be passionate about something in your life.
that you should love someone with everything that you have, even if you fall flat on your face and breaks your heart into pieces…loving so selflessly will change your life forever.
that giving away is the best way to receive.
that just because I disagree with someone, or because they have done something wrong, is not a good reason to toss them from my life or expect others to do the same.
that you need to choose in a relationship whether you would like to be right, or be happy.
that children learn much more from your actions and how you talk about other authority figures then they do about what you ask them to learn.
that you teach someone how to treat you.
that you need to know yourself, and love yourself, and realize that there is no one out there that can do it for you other than God.
that believing in God enriches your life…in more ways than you can count.
that talking to yourself doesn’t make you crazy…
that there is something completely freeing about telling the truth.
that you cannot please everyone, and the harder you try, the more miserable you and everyone else is.
that you can only be yourself…trying to pretend you are someone else only makes for WWIII eventually.
that hitting someone hurts you more than it does them inside.
that some people will never change, and that’s ok, but it still means I need to love them through it anyway for their own good.
I have a theory. And if you bear with me, it might make it as easy as it has made it for me to forgive people their cruelties and emotional abusive behavior…whether it is work, school, family or spouse.
Have you ever been around someone who just enough was never enough? No matter what you said, it wasn’t right. No matter what you did, it was the wrong thing. No matter how hard you tried, they would go out of their way so you knew the effort was wasted…just like the husk you were quickly becoming and were regretting inhabiting. The bouts of scathing remarks, barbed comments, double edged compliments that made you wonder what you did to deserve that treatment?
It’s so hard being in that situation. Because your worst fears, your deepest secrets are being vocalized as if they were true. Everything that you wonder about yourself and fear will happen and someone feels like there is enough to truth to it to force your nose in it every time they see you. And you wonder what you could have possibly done to them. What is so wrong with me that I bring this on when they see? What could I have done that was so terrible to deserve it? And the worst thought that never goes away.
What if they are right?
It’s almost impossible some days to push their abuse out of your mind. It affects everything you do, say, wear and go. It poisons your dreams…if you let it.
If you let it. Do you hear me? If you refuse to forgive it will haunt every step of your life.
Forgiveness. Seems such a weak word after everything you go through sometimes. As if it could wipe those scars you bear away…or change the falter in your step these days. But why not? Why write it off? Why not try for some understanding…and take control of that abuser. Take the club right out of their hands and take a good look as the reason they are concentrating so hard on you. Look at them.
Hurting people, hurt people. We have all heard it. And whether you were formerly in an abusive relationship or in one now…most days it sounds like a pathetic excuse. Let me give you something that has more substance though…because forgivness is so vital to leaving them behind and LIVING your life without them.
You see, to them, that pain that you feel, is what they are feeling. And for one moment, for a fraction of a second before guilt and remorse overcomes them again…they feel normal. Do you know why? Because their constant pain doesn’t seem so out of the ordinary when they are inflicting it on someone else. They don’t feel so out of place. So WRONG. For a sickening inexplicable second they are not alone. Their life looks less hopeless if they can convince themselves that yours is just the same. And it’s not you they are even attempting to convince…it’s themselves.
It’s not an excuse. It doesn’t make it right. But think about it…and see if some pity doesn’t come to you that pulls you out of that red haze that consumes you when you are around them. Try for some forgiveness…because who knows…you might help them find it for themselves.